mrpink essays

Networking with Humans

How to connect with honesty—without losing effectiveness (or humanity) along the way.

Some time ago, I was at an event with a founder friend. She was surprised by how easily I connected with people. The funny thing is, I’m an introvert — going to a networking event doesn’t come naturally to me. But with time (and a lot of practice), I learned to do it reasonably well.

The key, when approaching someone, is to have an honest intention to get to know the person.Be present. Observe. Listen more than you speak. Don’t approach to ask — approach to offer attention and openness. Most people like to feel seen. No matter how important someone is, we all like to feel special. Even when we sense there’s a bit of technique involved, we tend to go along with it — because it’s still a human gesture.

So how do we create what seems, at first glance, like a paradox: an authentic intention? Strange as it sounds, I believe it does.

When you’re in a sales or fundraising role, there’s a real need: close contracts, generate revenue, keep the startup alive. That’s clear, and the person on the other side knows it too. The moment they agreed to take the call, they knew what they were getting into. It’s not as if we were stopping strangers on the street to pitch them a B2B solution.

The rules of the game are clear.But that doesn’t mean we should act like a machine reciting the product’s features.It’s far more powerful to try to understand the person beyond the business — what they’re experiencing, how they arrive at this conversation, what their gestures, silences, or energy are telling us.

And to adapt our message to that moment.Not only because it’s more effective, but because it’s a basic form of respect. That person is investing their time to listen to us. And if they feel our intention is honest — even if they know there’s an objective behind it — it’s easier for them to trust, to listen, to want to collaborate.

I remember when I started raising MrPink’s first fund.A founder friend I’d worked with years earlier said to me: “How are you going to raise capital if you’ve never sold anything?”

He was right. I realized I needed to reinvent myself — to learn how to sell, yes, but not from a script. From the relationship.

Months later, I could build strong rapport in seconds during a video call. If I saw an easel behind someone, I’d ask about art.If I sensed fatigue, I’d ask whether it was a good time or if they preferred to reschedule.It’s not magic — it’s paying attention, feeling, adapting.

People can tell when someone’s on autopilot. I see it often at events: a founder starts chatting and suddenly their face, posture, and tone shift. They enter pitch mode. Even if they already told me it’s a personal finance startup, they start again from the top, as if hitting play.

And when one side switches to autopilot, the other side disconnects.

But when I sense that someone is truly speaking to me — not seeing me as a wallet or a lead, but as a person they want to build something with (even if it’s just a brief connection in those few minutes) — then I naturally want to listen, help, and collaborate.

Humans before leads

It’s not about doing networking.

It’s about meeting humans.

If we can hold an honest intention — even within clearly commercial contexts — we can communicate from a different place. We listen better. We become more effective.
But above all, we become more human.And in the end, that’s what makes relationships last and opportunities arise.